


Extra Ships For SJCPITOJHHA

by NeedsCaffeineRightNow



Series: TMA Twitter Au [2]
Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Multi, Other, Twitter, Twitter AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-14
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:54:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24712675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeedsCaffeineRightNow/pseuds/NeedsCaffeineRightNow
Summary: (Could you imagine if that acronym was actually something I used? That would suck. It stands for "Send Jon Cat Photos, It's The Only Joy He Has Anymore" btw)This fic is like a spin-off of the fic mentioned in the parenthesis above. It is different ships that are joked about, alluded to,etc. but that hadn't been explored there.You really gotta read the one before this one, like this does not make sense if you read it first, you can, I can't stop you, but it will be confusing because these are like an au inside an au, so yeah, but do what you want and have fun.
Relationships: Helen | The Distortion & Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Jonathan Sims / Jonathan Sims, Martin Blackwood & Sasha James & Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist & Tim Stoker, Michael | The Distortion & Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Nikola Orsinov & Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Nikola Orsinov/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Oliver Banks & Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Oliver Banks/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Other Relationship Tags to Be Added
Series: TMA Twitter Au [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1786690
Comments: 29
Kudos: 258





	1. Jon X Oliver Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> You know, I could just add all the ships to the tags now but the Jiminy Cricket inside my head won't let me, but don't worry they will all be written :)
> 
> Also this could be ten times funnier, but I don't know, it turned out like this.

**😐Oliver⚰️**  
  
 **Jon:** hey   
  
**Oliver** : Hello   
  
**Jon** : do you want to pretend to be my boyfriend?   
  
**Oliver** : Why can’t I be your actual boyfriend?   
  
**Jon:** i dont know   
  
**Oliver** : That doesn’t answer my question   
  
**Jon** : and you never answered mine   
  
**Oliver** : Am I allowed to flirt with you? I mean we have to put on a good show   
  
**Jon:** i would expect nothing less   
  
**Oliver:** Then, I guess, I’ll see you soon   
  
**Jon:** thanks   
  
**Oliver:** No problem 

* * *

  
  
“Please, come in, sit down, make yourself at home, don’t step on the cats”, Jon said ushering his friends into his flat. They all said their greetings and made their way to the living room area.   
The three archival assistants sat along the couch, and were looking up at Jon.   
  
“So, where’s the mystery person?”, Tim asked, looking at Jon expectantly.   
  
“He went to pick up the pizza”, Jon explained, sitting down on one of the arm chairs.   
  
“He?”, Sasha asked a bit surprised.   
  
“Yeah, he”, He told her, “Look, Sasha, if you’re gonna be homophobic-”   
  
“No! It’s not that, I just thought you were straight”, She explained.   
  
“How? Elias only hires gay people”, Jon told her. She was about to say something when a man came around the corner of the room carrying pizzas, and spoke.   
  
“And yet he’s still homophobic”, The man shook his head. He waked over to the coffee table and set the pizzas down. They all looked up at him. He was a tall man, with dark brown skin, he had worried lines etched into his face, making him appear older, though they assumed he was about the same age as Jon, his dreadlocks were white on the ends, he was wearing a black t-shirt and jeans, making him the second most casually dressed person, next to Tim who was wearing shorts.   
  
Jon smiled at him, “So, Oliver, do you want me to introduce you or do you wanna keep talking about my boss? I sincerely hope you pick the first one”   
  
“Go ahead”, Oliver said sitting down on the arm of Jon’s chair.   
  
“Okay, Sasha, Martin, Tim, this is Oliver Banks, also known as the love of my life”, Jon told them, he grabbed Oliver’s hand, noting how warm it was for someone who was an avatar of the end.   
  
They all stared at them for a moment, all having varying reactions. Sasha thought it was adorable, if not a bit surprising, Tim was also a bit shocked by what Jon had said, but ultimately he wanted to take a picture to blackmail Jon with. And Martin knew right then and there that he did _not_ like Oliver Banks.   
  
“Awe, thanks babe, I love you too”, Oliver said, looking down at Jon, smiling sweetly.   
  
It was just then that the yellow door on the wall opposite them opened up and Michael stepped out, saw what was happening and it immediately turned back around, “Helen! You owe me twenty pounds!”   
  
Helen appeared in front of him, “Why?”, then she saw what it was talking about and who Jon had invited to be his partner, she could have sworn it would be Annabelle.   
  
“Do I want to know what you two were betting on?”, Jon asked, knowing exactly what they had been betting on, but it wasn’t like he could address it with the others there.   
  
“The color shirt Tim would be wearing. I said it would be green, but Michael insisted it would be pink, and look, it was right, who’da thunk”, Helen said, grinning a grin that was so wide her face split in half.   
  
“Helen, it’s Wednesday”, Michael told her.   
  
“You keep saying that like I should know what that means”   
  
“Jon, you want me to trust them, but she hasn’t even seen Mean Girls”, Tim said, looking away from the two avatars.   
  
“Michael has”, Jon pointed out.   
  
“I have”, Michael nodded.   
  
“We’ll it watch on Movie night, Helen, don’t worry”, Oliver told her, seeing how completely lost she was.   
  
“Thank you”, She smiled at him, and then made her way to the last arm chair, sitting down in front of it. Michael followed and sat on the floor next to her.   
  
“Why don’t you just use the chair?”, Martin asked.   
  
“Too short”, They said at the same time, glaring at Jon.   
  
“Don’t look at me like that, you guys can shrink down”, He said, gesturing at them as he spoke, dragging Oliver’s hand with him.   
  
“And you could buy bigger chairs”, Helen told him.   
  
“Oliver and I are both very tall and we fit in the chairs fine”, Jon said, “And I like these chairs, Georgie helped me pick them out”   
  
“If Oliver fits in the chairs so well why is he sitting in your lap?”, Michael asked.   
  
“He’s not in my lap, just so we’re clear. And maybe I want him to sit here”, Jon told it.   
  
“Fine, doesn’t change the fact that your chairs too small”, Helen reminded him.   
  
“No it’s not, you’re just too big”   
  
“Rude!”   
  
The argument continued for almost three more minutes until they called a truce and Jon suddenly remembered that he had to actually be some kind of host and feed his guests.   
  
“Hold on, I’ll go get the plates and the drinks”, He said standing, still not letting go of Oliver’s hand, dragging the other man with him.   
  
“I guess I’ll go help”, He laughed, though a bit surprised that Jon could even move him considering the size difference.   
  
They talked while they were in the kitchen, and the people in the living room caught bits and pieces of the conversation.   
  
(“If you want help you have to let go of my hand”   
“No”   
“Please?”   
  
“Jon!”, this was followed by a loud crashing noise followed by laughter.   
  
“Why is everything so cluttered?”   
“I suck at unpacking stuff”   
“I said I would help”   
“I know”   
  
“Oliver could you hand me that?”   
“The blender?”   
“Yeah”   
“Why?”   
“It’s in the wrong spot”)   
  
Eventually Helen asked Martin a question and they all zoned out the noise in the kitchen.   
  
“So, how’re you holding up, Martin?”, She asked, “Seen any spiders recently?”   
  
“A couple”, He told her, “And I’m fine, I guess”   
  
“No, you’re not Martin, just like how Tim isn’t fine and Sasha and I both know the man in the kitchen with Jon once came by the archives using a different name”, Michael said.   
  
“So, it is him!”, Sasha shouted, “I thought I recognized him”   
  
“But, you don’t have to worry about the fake identity thing, Oliver Banks is his real name”, Helen told them, “And it is such a good name isn’t it?”   
  
“I don’t think it’s all that great”, Martin muttered. Helen smirked when she heard that.   
  
“STOP TRYING TO START DRAMA HELEN!”, Jon shouted from the kitchen. Helen frowned and crossed her arms over her chest, now bored.   
  
But not for very long because a few moments later Jon and Oliver stepped out of the kitchen, but Oliver was soaking wet.   
  
“You said this place was in perfect condition, no problems”, Jon told Helen.   
  
“What happened?”, She asked, very concerned, about her career as a real estate agent.   
  
“The faucet just blew up”, Oliver told her, “And sprayed water all over me”   
  
“I’ll call someone after dinner”, Helen sighed, someone was about to lose their job.   
  
“Thanks”, Jon smiled at her, she really didn’t have to help him with all this, and he did appreciate it.   
  
“I’m going to go change”, Oliver said, “you guys can just start without me”, he said walking towards the bedroom.   


* * *

  
  
Jon and Oliver walked into the kitchen and began to look through the cabinets and unpacked boxes for the plates. Which was kind of difficult to do while holding hands.   
  
“If you want help you have to let go of my hand”, Oliver finally told him.   
  
“No”, Jon didn’t want to go, there was something comforting about the heat Oliver radiated.   
  
“Please?”, He tried again. Jon nodded and let go, not saying anything else about it and they carried on looking.   
  
“Jon!”, Oliver called, watching several pots fall from a cabinet around the other man, luckily none of them hit him, and they both thought it was kind of funny after a moment. Once again they went back to searching.   
  
“Why is everything so cluttered?”, Oliver asked, barely able to navigate around the room.   
  
“I suck at unpacking stuff”, Jon sighed.   
  
“I said I would help”, All of the had offered actually.   
  
“I know”, Jon just had a problem with admitting he needed help. It was then that they found the plates and Jon moved to the sink to rinse them off.   
  
“Oliver could you hand me that?”, He said once all of the plates had been rinsed and dried.   
  
“The blender?”, Oliver asked pointing at the machine.   
  
“Yeah”   
  
“Why?”   
  
“It’s in the wrong spot”   
  
“Everything is in the wrong spot”, Oliver reminded him , but still he handed him the blender.   
  
“I know”, Jon sighed, taking the blender and setting it somewhere else. Oliver shook his head and stopped over to the sink to wash his hands, as he began to do so, Jon yelled something at Helen, causing him to look towards him.   
  
And it was at that moment that he was looking at Jon that the faucet decided to blow up and spray him with water. 

* * *

  
  
Oliver came back into the living room wearing a very large sweater, with his hands up the sleeves.   
  
“Is that Jon’s?”, Tim asked, looking over at him.   
  
“Yes, but you know what are only partially Jon’s?”, Oliver asked, they all shook his head, except for Jon, Oliver had already made this joke. “These”, He said, pulling his hands out of his sleeves revealing the two baby kittens.   
  
“Awe! They’re even cuter in real life!”, Sasha said, and the others couldn’t help but agree. Oliver smiled and handed her the General, but took the Colonel with him back over to Jon’s chair, where he sat down once again.   
  
“Hello”, He smiled down at him and Jon returned the smile.   
  
“You look really good in that sweater”, this was apparently all it took for the great Oliver Banks to stop working and to start blushing like crazy. Jon shook his head and just grabbed Oliver’s hand in his own again.   


* * *

  
  
“What now?”, Helen asked once they were done eating.   
  
“We could play cards”, Oliver suggested.   
  
Jon then leaned very close to him and whispered, “A game of cards against death?”   
  
This made Oliver laugh, which made the others stare at him like he was crazy, but he just kept laughing, Jon was grinning next to him, very proud of himself for what he had just accomplished.   
  
“Okay, no cards”, Oliver said after catching his breath, he wasn’t actually sure that he wouldn’t accidentally take one of their souls, so it was better to play it safe than sorry.   
  
“We should play never have I ever”, Michael said.   
  
“Why?”, Jon asked.   
  
“Because I want to”, Michael shrugged.   
  
“I’m cool with it”, Tim spoke up, he hadn’t spoken much that evening, but it was obvious that he was trying to get along with the others as much as he could.   
  
“Me too”, Martin said, surprising Jon a bit. Sasha also agreed, causing Jon and Oliver and Helen to give in and join them.   
  
The only real downside to this game was the fact that Jon now had to let go off Oliver’s hand, which he didn’t want to do, Oliver was just so warm. So he moved to sit on the floor, pulling Oliver down with him, so now they were sitting shoulder to shoulder against each other.   
  
“Are you using me right now?”, Oliver asked, having caught on, “To stay warm?”   
  
“Yeah, you remember that morning that I went into work late for you because I didn’t want to wake you up?”, Jon asked.   
  
“Point taken”   
  
“Wait”, Martin said, having listened to the conversation, as had everyone else, “The one time you ever came in late, and it was because you didn’t want to get out of bed?”   
  
“Martin, I know it sounds dumb, but have you ever been in love?”, Jon asked, which would have been really mean if he knew how Martin felt about him.   
  
“Are you about to start quoting Legally Blonde?”, Tim asked.   
  
“Yes”, Jon nodded, “Yes I am”   
  
It was silent for a moment before Sasha spoke up, “Are we going to play or not?”   
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Jon X Oliver Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the second half of the chapter before this one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last JonOliver chapter for this book most likely and so I am very sorry except I am not because I am about to be spoonfeeding you these two in the main book, sooooooooo
> 
> Also it gets a bit real for a moment, but only for a moment
> 
> Also Also I am sorry for this not being as funny as it could be, but it's been a while okay? Good, I hope you enjoy this

They were about half way through the game of Never Have I Ever, and everyone still had five fingers up. Now it was Oliver's turn to ask a question. 

He looked up at Helen and Micheal both of them nodding at him, encouraging him to ask the question he'd been wanting to ask all night. Oliver smiled at them and then turned to face Jon who was still on the floor next to him. His smile hanged from a smirk and the room seemed to grow colder. 

Jon paled not ready for whatever was coming, knowing it was going to be about him, andhis three coworkers were all a bit uncomfortable watching this go down. 

"Never have I ever", Oliver began slowly, " Flirted with my boss' ex-husband who's also thirty years older than me?"

"Fuck you", Jon told him, not really angry, but he was very good at preteneding to be. He put one of his fingers down and sulked. 

"What is going on? Elias has been married?", Tim asked. 

Oliver nodded, "Yeah about", he stopped to think about it, "Fifteen times? Is that right?"

"Mhm", Jon hummed, "He's on his fifteenth divorce now too"

"He's married fifteen people?", Sasha asked, she was pretty sure Elias was one of those people who stayed single and enjoyed it. 

"No, don't be ridiculous, there's not fifteen people who can stand Elias, let alone marry him", Helen laughed. 

"He's married the same man fifteen times", Michael added. 

"Why?", Martin asked, "If they've gotten married and divorced so many times why do they keep restarting the cycle?"

"They're trying to see who's-", Oliver began, but Jon elbowed him so that he couldn't finish the sentence and then handed him a Bible. 

"Read that", Jon said and then turned back towards Martin, "It's a power play, though when they don't despise each other, I do think they at least like the other one"

"Which sucks for Jon" Helen smiled, "He's in love with Peter"

"He's what now?", Sasha asked. 

"Oh I have to send you screenshots of some of the things Jon has said", Helen told her.

"I will send you back to your maker Helen", Jon warned her. 

"You don't even know my maker"

"I know everything"

"Whatever", Helen shrugged, "Let's continue with the game"

"Wait this is just getting good", Oliver said, _actually_ reading the Bible Jon handed him. 

"I'm sure it is", Jon sighed, grabbing the book, "but you can read it later"  
He set the book on the coffee table after putting the ribbon bookmark on the page Olver had been on. 

"Who's turn is it?", Tim asked. 

"Mine",Jon said, and then he thought for a moment, "Never have I ever kidnapped my friend so they would stop working and pay attention to me"

Michael and Helen immediatly put a finger down, but at least had the courtesy to look a little sheepish. It surprised them a bit when Oliver also put a finger donw, but was smirking. But the most surprising was when Tim also put a finger down. 

"What?", he asked looking at their surprised faces, "Have you ever tried to hang out with Jon when he's busy? It's impossible"

"I didn't know you and Jon ever hung out", Martin admitted and Sasha nodded. 

"We did a little more than that", Jon muttered, quiet enought that only the two closest to him, Tim and Oliver, heard it. 

"Oh, shut up", Tim smacked his arm, more playfully than in a way that would actually hurt, and Oliver just looked very confused, but Jon just smirked. 

"It's your turn Tim", He told him.   
-

The game kept going until both Michael and Jon only had one finger each and it was Helen's turn. Both of them were begging her, silently, to ask a question about them first. 

Helen smiled and asked her question, "Neve have I ever gotten a new job because the thing that had it last died"

Both Jon and Micael put a finger down, hands facing one another, effectively flipping each other off. 

"You had to word it like that? You couldn't let me have it this one time?", Jon asked, her. 

"Well, as I see it, Gertrude Robinson wasn't really a human or a person, so I don't know how you wanted me to word it", Helen answered, and even though it wasnt said he could practically hear the "Archivist" on the tip of her multi-colored tongue, making him go stiff. Oliver reached over and grabbed his unoccupied hand and began to rub circles on the back of it hoping to soothe him a little bit. 

It took her a moment, but Helen realized what she had said and shot him as good of an apologetic look as she could, knowing she couldn't say anything in front of the archival assistants, all of which were very confused when the atmosphere changed and the tension began to build a bit. 

But Jon hadn't stopped smiling and just laughed it off, even thought he laugh was very strained, and said, "That's fair, it's Michael's turn right?"

And so the game continued, but Oliver shot Jon a look telling him that they were going to talk about it later. 

-  
After the archives staff left, Jon and Oliver sat back down in the living room, on the couch this time, and Helen and Michael were standing. 

" I am very sorry, Jon, and it actually pains me to apologize, so I hope you know I am being very sincere, I did not mean to say _that_ to you", Helen told him. 

"I know, it's fine", Jon assured her, "You two should get going or you're going to miss all the people wandering home alone"

"That's true", Michael grabbed Helen's arm, "Thank you for the pizza and the nice game with your friends"

"You're welcome, thank for coming", Jon told it. 

"No problem", Helen smiled and then thanked him again, "It was a lot of fun, and sorry, again"  
With that they both disappeared through the door. 

Once they were completely gone, door and all, Oliver looked at Jon, "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really", Jon muttered, petting the Colonel. 

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah", Jon nodded, "Do you want to watch a movie?"

"You're not going to kick me out?", Oliver asked jokingly. 

"No, but only because you've been so nice tonight"

"Are you sure it's not becuase you want to keep cuddling and holding my hand?"

"I don't have to answer that", Jon said. 

"That just pretty much confirms it", Oliver smiled. 

Jon huffed, but was fighting to keep a smile off his face. He grabbed the remote off of the coffee table and turned the tv on, "What do you want to watch?"

"Something stupid"

"That doesn't really narrow it down"

It took them a while before they found one to watch that wasn't on their movie night watchlist. As the opening credits rolled they settled into a more relaxing position, their hands were clasped together and Jon was practically top of Oliver how much he was leaning on him. 

-

By the time the movie was over they were both dozing off, and they were still in their clothes from dinner, and neither of them wanted to get up. 

"Oliver?", Jon said into the silence that had fallen when the movie went off. 

"Yeah?"

"Do you really want to be my boyfriend?", Jon actually moved to look up at him now, but was still leaninggg on him. 

"I think you already know the answer to that", Oliver looked back at Jon, smiling. 

"I know, but coul you just-"

"Yes, I do really want to be your boyfriend"

"Good, because I want you to be my boyfriend too", Jon told him. 

"Really?", Oliver asked, surprised. 

"Yeah", he nodded, smiling the biggest smile that a tired Jonathan Sims could muster, "I promise"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr @needscaffeine
> 
> What relationship do you guys want next?
> 
> -Jon X Peter(but in a funny way not in an actual relationship sort of way)  
> \- Jon X Georgie   
> \- Jon X Melanie  
> \- Jon X Melanie X Georgie  
> \- Jon X Jon  
> \- Jon X Archive Tim  
> \- Jon X Gunpowder Tim  
> \- Jon X Gerry (Alive or Dead? I can't pick)  
> -Any ship you'd like to suggest  
> ( I will probably also pull votes from the last time I asked too, just an fyi)
> 
> EXPLANATION OF WHERE I HAVE BEEN BELOW, FEEL FREE TO SKIP:
> 
> I know you guys probably don't want an explanation as to where I have been mostly referring to the original this is based on, but I feel as though I owe you one, just a little bit, but I am going to be as vague as I can, so:   
> Basically I have been sick (I don't have corona though, just an fyi) and was dealing with that and I have gotten some bad news but it's not life threatening, it was just causing my mood to not be super good but we have a good bit of it taken care of and the thngs we don't have taken care of we are already making plans for and I have been feeling a little better and I really wanted to update something while my mood was better, and hopefully I can ride this small high for a while.   
> (I don't want this to be taken as a 'they're just saying this so we don't get upset about them upddating' because it's not and I know none of you are like that, not when you always say such nice things)
> 
> I hope all of you are doing fantastic and that you're having a good day too!


	3. Nikola (Part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nikola comes for Dinner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all know the drill with these. Just extra ships/ different ways things may go down

Jon was not looking forward to the night ahead of him. Martin, Sasha, Tim, Michael, Helen, _and Nikola_ would be over. And as much as he loved all of them, this was only a recipe for disaster. Especially since he was supposed to pretend to be dating Nikola.

At least this would not be the first time they had toyed with the idea. But then again, the first time, probably didn't count.

He had set about with busy work, which basically meant he was doing nothing, until the doorbell rung, and he opened it to let Nikola in.

"Jonny!!", She engulfed him in her long, plastic arms. He hugged her back, hoping she wasn't planning on calling him that all night long.

Once he was let go, Jon took in her outfit, and was glad it was somewhat normal. She was wearing rainbow striped overalls, a polka dotted shirt underneath, bright pink gloves to match the thirteen bows in her hair, her shoes were covered in what looked a lot like blood, but Jon knew was just red paint, and her hair was in thirteen perfect braids. At least she had dialed it back with the makeup.

"You look nice!", Jon told her, and he did mean it.

"Thank you, but I must say, and you know I must say it, because I must say, you look rather plain, Jon", Nikola pointed out, and he would have to agree, especially next to her, his sweater vest did not do much.

"Ma'am for the next fifteen minutes you have full reign of my closet", he told her and she grinned in a way that would make others run away screaming.

"Excellent Jon! That is just excellent! Give me two minutes!", She rushed towards his room, "Is anything off limits?"

"I suppose not", he called back, shutting the door, and following her through the flat.

* * *

Tim, Martin, and Sasha probably weren't planning on being greeted by Nikola, but Jon was still getting dressed. Nikola had gone way over her time with the clothes. He could only hope Tim didn't freak out.

"Welcome!", Nikola said, loud and proud, a ringmaster must do so, "I do hope you are ready for a wonderous night! Because I love it when people are disappointed"

The three of them were silent for a moment, but Sasha, Nikola was fairly certain that was her name, at least smiled at her joke.

"I am just kidding", Nikola told them, "Come in! Come in! Sit down! Sit down! Please! Jon is just finishing up with something!"

They all nodded and moved into the living area, giving her varying smiles.

"You must be his partner", Sasha asked, once they had been seated, and Nikola appreciated that greatly.

"Oh! I am! Miss, Jon and I are partners in crime! Where he goes I go! And vice versa!", She clasped her hands, "It has been that way since college!"

"I thought-", Martin, she thought, began, but was interuppted by Jon.

"I don't know about this shirt, Nikola", he said, standing where the others could not see him, but Nikola could, and she was practically bursting with joy when she saw it.

"But it looks so wonderful on you! And the colors go so well with your skin tone! Jon, you have to wear it!", she begged, and she rarely begged.

"Fine, fine", he caved, stepping in the room with them, and they could finally see what he was wearing.

It was a floral shirt, one someone had bought him as a joke, and a pair of jeans he hadn't realized he'd even owned, especially since they were bright pink.

"You look marvelous!", Nikola stood from the arm chair she had been perched on, draping herself over his shoulders, and turning him to face the others fully, "Doesn't he look marvelous? Just absolutely marvelous with a capital M!"

Jon blushed, so did Martin. Sasha immediatly agreed and Tim nodded but said something else.

"I bought you that shirt. Glad you're finally getting some use out of it", he said, and Jon grinned at him.

"You did?", Nikola asked, amazed, "The Stokers must truly taste wonderful- oof" Jon elbowed her, "Have wonderful taste", she corrected.

Tim's face went a little dark but he nodded all the same.

-

It was sometime later when Michael and Helen showed up. Or well, Michael did. It came in, and promptly sat on the floor, watching them. No one knew what to say. Jon was about to try anyways. Ask where Helen was, when Michael raised one of it's pointy fingers to it's mouth, and he stopped.

Then, very slowly, It reached into the front pocket of the trench coat it had on, and lifted out something about the size of a mouse, and placed it into Nikola's hands.

"Aw!", she said quietly, and they all leaned in closer to see a sleeping Helen. Nikola stood from where she was next to Jon, and went to place her in the other arm chair. "May I use your door?"

"Go ahead, third turn on your left, if you're looking for what I think you're looking for", he whispered back. Nikola bowed her head a little and entered the threachorous hallway.

Only moments later she came back holding a megaphone, everyone, other than Michael and Jon, covered their ears.

Nikola cleared her throat, not that there was actually anything to clear, and then put the device to her lips before saying, "THIS ISN'T A SLEEPOVER YOU SILLY BILLY GET THE FUCK UP!"

Helen shot up, growing over seven feet in a matter of seconds. She turned to look at Nikola, frowning at her for a moment, before laughing, something which could cause ears to bleed if one wasn't careful enough. Good thing the three who had not been completely taken by an entity, had their ears covered.

* * *

"You're not eating much", Sasha noted to Nikola, who was currently standing on her hands out of boredom, "Are you okay?"

"You have very nice skin", Nikola commented back, and just then Michael 'accidentally' bumped into her, knocking her over. She landed with a loud **_thunk_** , but was up in a matter of seconds.

"Thank you", Sasha smiled and Nikola grinned. Tim narrowed his eyes at her.

"What do you do, Nikola?", he asked, and Jon cut in then.

"She's a singer! And a really good one at that! And a part time clown", he said and Nikola was happy he was sticking to a good bit of the truth.

"Yes, Tim, if I may call you Tim, that is, that is what I do", she gestured at Jon, who nodded.

"We should go out for karaoke sometime", Michael mused and Sasha lit up.

"That sounds like so much fun!", she said, "I would love to go!"

Nikola smiled at Jon in a way that did not seem possible as it actually stretched across her whole face, ear to ear. "Can we go Jonny!?? It would just be the best if we could go! I understand if you say no, but I will be upset any way"

Jon just shook his head and took another bite of his food. Nikola frowned but shrugged and sat down on the arm of his chair.

"If you want, and Jon is okay with it, we could go on another night?", Sasha suggested, and Nikola grinned at her, this one much more tamed.

"That would be fantastic!! I also enjoy the opera, but that may be a bit meta", She said and Jon, who had just been taking a sip of his drink spat it out in surprise. Wiping his mouth he looked up at her, and frowned.

Tim was now sending a glare her way, as though he had figured out what was going on, but couldn't say it in case he was wrong.

Nikola on the other hand looked very interested in her gloves.

Michael on the other hand looked overjoyed, and said:

"I don't know, the opera has always made my skin crawl"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't even know if I want to write another part because it would be so funny if I just left it at that. 
> 
> Tumbler @needscaffeine

**Author's Note:**

> Tumblr @needscaffeine


End file.
